Hi there, I'm Jack vonSerialarsonist

Hi there, I'm Jack vonSerialarsonist. I sew together then detatch siamese twins.

That out of the way, greetings and salutations! I'm Jack. You might recognize me from Portals, Behind the Scenes, etc. as the evil, sadistic, manipulative monster that terrorizes Dan and Joe. Well, we got to thinking, and decided that since there can be weeks between new episodes, we should keep you, the fans, entertained. Now, as much as I LOVE torturing people, even I have some respect for the fans.

So after an extremely grueling Rock-Paper-Scissors tournament, I was chosen to somehow keep you all busy. So, I thought, why don't fans get to know the REAL Jack vonSerialarsonist? In truth, I'm not as stupid as I appear to be in the show...though just as evil. But what better way than this blog? There isn't, unless you could somehow see me juggle flaming kittens.

So, every week, I'm going to have another post, another story to tell, and hopefully another way to keep you all hooked as our videos implant my messages into your mind to turn you into my loyal slaves. With this first one, I'll be gentle and not warp your innocent minds too much...by telling you some things that Behind the Scenes DIDN'T tell you.

Dan actually killed one of the camera men when the Ball-Cube physics made him snap. It was funny to watch. During that time I stole his, Joe's, and the dead man's wallets. It was a good day.

Dr. K's "Thats What She Said" box made 22,579 more jokes in the next two and a half hours. You see, the guys from the show served a hot dog lunch. Dan got a foot-long while Joe was there, and one thing led to another.

Yes, I'm actually British, and my name IS NOT really Jack vonSerialarsonist...I mean really! That sounds idiotic. It sounds like the dumb sort of name a messed-up teenager in the middle of Indiana would come up with....my name's ACTUALLY Jack vonMajorstrangler.

Isn't it ironic that the first video involved Samuel L. Jackson teleporting, then about a year later, Samuel L. Jackson is in a movie where he hunts down teleporters? Just something to ponder.

Well fans, I hope this has given you at least a mild chuckle considering this is my first attempt at writing my thoughts NOT in blood, but look for new blogs weekly!

Well then, this is Jack vonSerialarsonist saying, "Good night, Sleep tight, don't let me bite and drain your soul." ...I know, it doesn't rhyme. But whatever. -Jack vonSerialarsonist.